Archives For hope

Expectations

October 22, 2012 — Leave a comment

expectations

No matter what age we are, we tend to rely on our expectations. For instance, this morning, our older daughter told the younger that it was crazy hat day at school, and gave her a crazy hat to wear. The only reason the older one did this is because she had a better hat in mind for herself.

The problem occurred when the older kid couldn’t find the hat she had in mind and took the first hat back that she had given our younger daughter. The younger one screamed and cried and threw a fit. Her expectation was that her Sissy would keep her word and let her use the hat. The circumstances changed and expectations met selfish reality and although I wasn’t there, it was a tough situation for my wife.

It happens, right? We expect certain things in life. Expect that it will turn out the way we planned. Sometimes we expect we will graduate high school and go to college, but sometimes people don’t get accepted, don’t have money, don’t have the grades. Sometimes we graduate college and expect we can get a great job and end up working part time at a local taco shack. Sometimes we get a specialized graduate degree and really have high expectations and end up doing something not at all related. Sometimes it’s confusing and heartbreaking when things don’t happen like we expect.

There’s nothing wrong with any of that, though. Really and truly. It’s ok! I’m just sorry it took me so long to figure that out.

The thing about expectations is, they can really hold you back. Sometimes we are stubborn about it, too. “No – I went to school for this, I’ve wanted this my whole life, and I am going to do this!” What if God has a different plan for you? That’s ok with you, isn’t it?

You know this verse, I know you do. Jeremiah 29:11. Here’s a different translation you may not have heard – “I have not lost sight of my plan for you, the Lord says, and it is your welfare I have in mind, not your undoing; for you, too, I have a destiny and a hope.”

Think on those words. Meditate on them. Realize how significant it is that God would say something like that to people like you and me.

Do you think your situation, regardless of what it is, caught God by surprise? He was just bebopping around in heaven, looked down and saw you hanging by a fingernail off the side of a cliff and said, “Wow that’s surprising to me. I didn’t see that coming at all.”

NO! He has not lost sight of any of us! He has a plan for us, and it’s a good plan – way better than anything we could ever come up with on our own.

My plans led to the confusion and heartbreak I’ve experienced, but God’s plan is always about destiny and hope – we all have a destiny that God has planned and that should give more hope than anything! More hope than the best job, more hope than a winning lottery ticket. More hope than you could ever imagine!

You, like me, might be thinking though that you are so far from where you thought you’d be that it’s hopeless. You might even be feeling worthless, like a failure, like you’ve messed it all up. I’ve been there, in fact I deal with that almost every day. Sometimes I feel like I wasted my whole life. I feel like I tried to do what God wanted me to do and failed and now I’ll never know what he really had in mind.

The good news is, this feeling is pretty common, and even better news is that with God, nothing is wasted. Not your most mind bending failure, not your lowest point, not anything. No single thing is wasted. God can and will redeem it all! That’s how big he is, and that’s how much he loves you!

Another verse – And some context first. Joseph was a man of dreams, and his brothers were so jealous that they threw him in a ditch and told his dad he was dead. Then they sold him into slavery. Then he was put in prison for something he didn’t do. These events make up the bulk of his life. For the majority of his life, if you look at it from the outside, you would think, “Wow it really sucks to be you. No, really.”

During all those years it would have been so easy for him to think, “you know what? This stinks, it’s not going to get better, my expectation was, based on my dreams that God gave me, that I’d be living in a big house and have a book deal with a movie option. And here I am rotting in jail. My life has been a waste! Why God?”

But in Genesis 50:20, we see that he didn’t just get out of jail, but that he’s the #2 guy in all of Egypt. He’s pharoah’s right hand. There is only one person with more power than him in the entire earth. And he gives God the glory for it! He says, “You meant to do me harm, but God meant it for good — so that it would come about as it is today, with many people’s lives being saved.”

What others meant for evil, God can turn to good. When your expectations fail you, God’s dreams for you will restore your hope. Don’t waste another minute on your plans! Go to God, discover his dreams for you, learn to follow him, and his dreams will become your dreams!

What do you think God is saying to you right now? What do you think his plans are for you? Ask him, and he’ll show it to you, and give you everything you need to fulfill your destiny!

In destiny, dreams, expectations, failure , , ,
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Ain’t That A Kick In The Head

July 25, 2012 — 1 Comment

I love that kind of music – kind of a smooth jazz. Don’t let this be well known, but I also kinda like Sinatra, Harry Connick Jr., Michael Buble, and others. Not as much as I like Def Leppard, but sometimes you’re just in the mood.

I like this particular song by Dean Martin because it talks about getting kicked in the head. Which is funny to me for some reason.

“How lucky can one guy be? I kissed her and she kissed me. Like the fella once said, ‘Ain’t that a kick in the head?’”

Why would a kiss be compared to a kick in the head? Well, have you ever kissed someone? Remember your first kiss, or a kiss with that special someone? Yes, I just said that. It’s electric, it gets your heart racing, your mind goes numb, your body tenses up. Like if you were to get kicked in the head.

I only mention that because Cheryl busted her head real good last night. We had to go to the doctor because of it. She bent over real quick, right into the door frame, which has a huge dent in it now. I heard the sound, saw her legs get rubbery, saw her collapse. I mean, she hit it hard. She was almost completely out when I got to her. Nothing like a kick in the head – her eyes were glazed over, she was dazed, her heart was racing.

Have you ever hit your head like that? It’s a surreal experience. Out of body, metaphysical, electric. Spiritual.

Have you ever had an encounter like that with God? Have you ever had the Spirit come over you, out of the blue, and just flat out kick you in the head? Metaphorically speaking obviously. God doesn’t kick people in the head. But sometimes he kinda does. Right?

I’m thinking about myself – how hard headed I am, and the lengths God went to to not just redeem me, but to get my attention. Sometimes it’s a gentle voice, like a spring breeze. Mostly if he wants my attention it’s a bone jarring experience and we pick up the pieces together and move on.

I’m also thinking about Israel. How many times in the bible were they walking with God, turned their back on him, got overrun by the Philistines or whoever then remembered how things were before they went their own way?

We all do this. Unfortunately. It’s normal. We are so blessed, we praise God, we worship him, we get all caught up in our lives, we get to a point where our worship is just songs, our prayers are just words, and our power is our own. Then something happens and we run back to God.

That’s not the way it’s supposed to be – you know that right? We are supposed to walk with God daily, we are supposed to be empowered by the Spirit daily, we are supposed to always be in a mindset of worship and prayer – continually. That’s the trick right there.

I think we all deserve a good kick to the head from time to time – it sets us straight, it reminds us what’s real, it reminds us who paid the price for us. Ideally, it would just happen once, but then again we’re human and we all need a course correction from time to time.

If you’re one of those that recognizes immediately when something is wrong and immediately correct it, good on you. Me? I’ll probably continue to need a good swift kick every now and then.

Pray for me, and with me – God is working in my life right now! He’s shaking things up, making me see the reality around me. Cheryl’s head wound reminded me that God has a plan for me, he’s not done, I’m not used up, too old, too broken – not ever – God still has a plan. I just wish it was my head that got hit - it can take a lot more abuse that Cheryl’s.

In attitude, holiness, Holy Spirit, hope, redemption, Uncategorized , , ,
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He Is Alive And So Am I! (Part 2)

April 6, 2012 — Leave a comment

In Student Ministry, the flagship event of ever summer, for me anyway, was always camp.  I started planning next year’s camp the day after camp was over.  I love camp.  I grew up going to Falls Creek – deep in the heart of the Arbuckle mountains of OK.  I went to camp there at least once every summer between 1980 and 2003, sometimes I went several weeks.  I surrendered to ministry there in 1982.  To say that it is a very special place to me is an understatement.

One year at camp, on Wednesday night, Cheryl decided to take Trinity with us to the worship service.  She was about 2 years old at the time.  There were not enough seats for all of us in the Tabernacle, and it was really hot, so we decided to sit on the brick wall right outside the back.  There was a nice breeze blowing, and we could hear everything going on inside.

About half way through the service, Trinity found a pothole about 10 feet in front of us.  It was full of rocks and dirt, and she would grab a handful and run back and put it in my hands.  She must have made 20 trips back and forth to fill my cupped hands with dirt and rocks.

It was invitation time for everyone in the tabernacle, and I was listening to what the speaker was saying.  He said, “I want you to close your eyes.  Think of those things in your life that keep you from living abundantly. Think of those things in your life that keep you from fulfilling God’s purpose for you.  Now, cup your hands, and hold those things out in front of you.  Give them to God.  Let him take them from you so that you can live life the way it was meant to be lived.”

I looked down at my hands.  They were full of dirt and busted up pieces of asphalt.  Now, I am not a big believer in coincidence.  I am also not a big believer in every little thing having a some big meaning.  But I had to consider that maybe God was trying to show me something.

Yesterday I mentioned here that often what happens in life is the Thief comes and steals something from us and I believe that what specifically he takes is our present joy in life.  He does this by keeping us in the past.  He reminds us of past sin, regrets, shame.  The result is that we end up living in guilt rather than living in grace.

When I looked down at the dirt and debris in my hands, I realized that my past was still a big part of who I am.  And that a person’s past can hold them back.  Your past can keep you from being free, but God can redeem your past, no matter what is there.

You know why they call it the past?  Because I has already passed.  It’s gone.  There is nothing you can do to go back and change what you have done or haven’t done.  The memories will never go away, and the feelings that come with them are sometimes just as strong as they were when it actually happened.  Your past can destroy your present.

Nothing is unforgivable.  But to have that kind of relationship with God, you have to let go of your life and the things that hold you back.  You have to let go of your past.  If you don’t, you will be living in the shadow of wrath, and not in the Light of a great and loving Father.

As for me, I have discovered what it means to live in the Presence of Greatness.  It is to open up your hands and let go of the junk that you cannot possibly deal with.  It is to be in the presence of a Father that loves you so much that you cannot possibly disappoint him.

So, I turned my hands over, let the dirt and rocks fall to the ground.  Cheryl gave me a baby wipe.  And the service was over.  It’s in the past now, along with a thousand other memories.  And now it is my choice, and your choice, to come before God and leave those things behind, and receive the abundance he offers those with the boldness to approach him.

What are you holding on to?  What is the Holy Spirit asking you to give up?  You can give it to Him and accept the abundant life being offered to you right now!  That’s what the Resurrection is all about!  The only other choice is living a defeated, crippled life.  The only other choice is living for the past.  That is not the kind of life that Christ died and lives to give you.  Let it go!  Give it to Him, and live!

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Very Important People

April 3, 2012 — Leave a comment

We all know important people, and we all know people who think they are important.  Where I work, every single day, the same person parks their red Mercedes in the same parking spot right by the door.  Backwards.  I even got there super early one day to see if I could get that spot.  I was going to park my 1998 F-150 in the spot right by the door.  Backward.  Just to see what would happen.  I got to work at 7 am – an hour early – and that stinking car was already there.  I’m beginning to think it is not owned by anybody, it’s just parked there so nobody can have the spot.  Either that, or it belongs to a Very Important Person.  After all, it’s a Mercedes.

We all know important people, and we all know people who think they are Very Important People.  What I’ve noticed about the VIPs is they are generally insecure.  You can tell because of all the bragging.  I know them when I see them because I used to be one.

I used to tell people, who never asked, how many kids I had at church on Wednesday night.  I used to tell, without being asked, how awesome I did when I preached last Sunday morning, and how many people came forward.  I still know the stats – how many I’ve led to Christ, how many I’ve baptized, etc.

None of those numbers are bad – they represent people who have met God and whose lives have been changed by that encounter.  They represent God working through me in an awesome way.  But I didn’t feel awesome about it for some reason.  I felt like if I told everyone they would see how important I was and how much God was using me.  I was insecure in my relationship with God.

That’s pretty much what it comes down to, isn’t it?  Our own individual relationship with God.  I’ve moved away from the idea that God wants to use me, or that I can be used by God.  I’ve moved away from the idea (and it was very difficult) that to be a minister I need to work for a church – even though I am convinced that that is still my calling.  I’ve moved away from the idea that my identity has to be wrapped up in what I do.  I’ve moved away from that, and I’ve drawn close to God.

James 4:8 says this – “Draw near to God and He will draw near to you. Cleanse your hands, you sinners; and purify your hearts, you double-minded.”

I always got the first part – makes sense, right?  Draw near to God.  I always ignored the part about sinners and being double minded.  That’s just as important as drawing near.  Drawing near is all I can do.  I can’t cleanse my own sin, and I can’t change my own mind.

What I have found is, if I draw near, under my own power, if I read the Scriptures, if I write my sermons, if I baptize people, but if I still have sin in my life, I become double minded.  I begin to think how great I am.  And when I become great, I want the world to know just how great and how Very Important I am.

But – when I draw near to God, for real, when I come to Him a mess, dirty, confused, and when I come to Him honest about it, He cleanses my hands, He straightens out my mind.  In other words (James 4:10) when I humble myself in His presence, He lifts me up.

A wise man once said, you can no more change yourself than you can put your hands under your own feet and lift yourself off the ground.  You can’t make yourself important, you can’t make yourself great.  Greatness is this life is not who you are, not what you have, not who you know, but what you allow God to do in you.  What He does in you affects the lives of those around you.  By pursuing a relationship with God, you change the world!

Only God can lift you up.  Only God can make you a Very Important Person.  Draw near to Him, allow Him to make you into who He always dreamed you could be!

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Back to the Present

March 30, 2012 — 3 Comments

Several years back, I was an associate pastor in a church.  I was mostly a student minister, but I had several other responsibilities.  I had been in student ministry for about 12 years at that point, and to be honest, for several years before that, I had felt God calling me to something different, but it scared me to death, so I just kept doing what I had always known – it was easy, I had a routine, I got results.

The real reason that I didn’t pursue what God was calling me to do was because of something in my past.  What I didn’t know at the time was, the past was about to massively pile up on me and bring about a wilderness experience that would last the next 5 years.

It goes back to 1994.  I had just resigned from my first church, and was in the process of being divorced from my first wife.  There’s a lot to tell about that, and I may do it at some other point.  Suffice it to say we were both in the wrong.  Maybe I was more wrong.  I don’t know.  All I knew is that if I were to ever get married again, I would do it differently.

Fast forward several years to the already mentioned staff position, I was married, had a sweet little daughter, and was miserable.  I hadn’t learned anything, really.  I didn’t allow healing to occur from that past trauma.  I never talked to anyone about it, and I brought all that into the present.

One day, during a staff meeting at my church, the pastor announced he was firing several staff people, including me.  He said he wanted a fresh start with new people.  So I packed up and left, and started sending out resumes.  So I could start the cycle all over again.  But God had a different plan.

I had a lot of interviews at some pretty amazing churches, and in many instances, it came down between me and some other person.  They always chose the other person.  I started sending my resume out to smaller churches.  I was thinking they would be thinking they would be getting a bargain – someone with my experience, willing to work for close to nothing.  Most of them never even called me back.  Over qualified maybe?  Or God’s plan?

Somewhere along the way we tried a church plant, which went well until it didn’t.  Then we ended up at a totally different church – hurt, confused, scared, alone.

During those years, I turned and ran from God, from what He was trying to teach me.  I didn’t want to hear it.  I wanted familiar, I wanted safe, I wanted things to be like they were before.  But they couldn’t be.  I had been hurt too deeply, and to be honest, in my last church staff experience, I was basically limping along, relying on my own strength.

But this new church – it was something different.  Something special.  Exactly what I needed and exactly where God wanted me and my family, so that we could learn who God really is, what He is really like, how He really feels about us.

Two years later I am a totally different person.  I am being healed.  I am seeing how my past failures, hurts, sins can be redeemed.  What I learned is, God doesn’t want to use me, he wants to know me.  He wants me to know Him and trust Him and He wants me to run to Him and seek shelter in Him and rely on Him for everything.  I’m learning to do that, and He has given me my ministry, but in a totally unexpected way.

Do I still want to work for a church – yes!  Will I be able to?  I believe so.  Am I ready?  I believe so!  Am I scared?  Yes.  Yes I am.  But I am going to take that step, resting in Him, and I will trust Him to put me where He wants me, so that my past can be redeemed in my present, so that the future of others can be wrapped in His grace.

What have you not trusted God with?  What from your past is eating away your present?  And how can you learn to give all that to the only One who can purchase the terrible things that have happened and give you a beautiful future in exchange?

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